The Meekrat Entertainment Group

Xig: It’s all come down to this! Captain Depresso versus Mike P! Are you two ready?
Captain Depresso and Mike P: Yeah.
Xig: Go! Captain Depresso starts by launching himself at Mike P, letting out some sort of primordial roar!
Captain Depresso: RAWR!
Mike P: My god!
Solana: Mike P attempts to jump out of the way, but Captain Depresso grabs his foot and picks him up! He’s upside-down!
Mike P: Let me go!
Captain Depresso: No! I know you said you’d give me your wish, but I’m not going to just give up!
Mike P: That’s good, I guess, but now I have to do this!
Solana: Mike P is charging up his hat-thing!
Xig: This spells trouble for Captain Depresso, as Mike P lets loose with a plasma bolt!
Captain Depresso: Ughn!
Xig: He drops Mike P, who lands on his head!
Mike P: Ow.
Captain Depresso: That’s slightly unfair.
Mike P: I have tiny limbs and flipper-arms. I think the fact that I can shoot stuff out of my hat evens the odds a bit.
Captain Depresso: I guess. You do look kind of like a football.
Solana: Captain Depresso is taking a few steps back.
Mike P: What are you doing?
Xig:: Captain Depresso is running up to Mike P! He kicks him through the air!
Mike P: AGH!
Solana: Mike P is punted into the distance. Is he down and out?
Xig: What is that?
Solana: It looks like a plasma bolt. It hits Captain Depresso in the leg!
Xig: Something else is coming up. Mike P has some sort of shining platform. What the heck?
Solana: It must be something from the hat. Did you know about this?
Xig: No. He’s riding it towards Depresso, and he looks mad!
Mike P: You didn’t have to punt me like that!
Captain Depresso: I told you, I wasn’t going to make this easy!
Mike P: You didn’t have to kick me!
Xig: Mike P charges up a shot and blasts Captain Depresso, who dodges it!
Solana: Captain Depresso jumps towards Mike P, trying to grab him. He manages to grab the edge of the platform. He’s grimacing. Looks like that hurts.
Xig: He climbs onto the shining platform.
Captain Depresso: I won’t lose.
Mike P: I wouldn’t wager on that.
Xig: Mike P jumps off the platform, which flickers away, but the momentum is still carrying Captain Depresso towards the ground. He hits the ground rolling. My god, that was brutal.
Solana: He’s getting up! Captain Depresso is getting up! Neither of them will stay down!
Xig: Mike P is charging up a plasma bolt and lets it loose on Captain Depresso. He’s knocked backwards! He’s bruised and kind of bloody, but he’s laughing.
Solana: Mike P is laughing, too, despite being scuffed up.
Xig: Okay, let’s wait for them to stop laughing.
Solana: Captain Depresso has stopped laughing.
Xig: Only because Mike P kicked him in the head. Captain Depresso has been knocked out! Which makes Mike P the winner of the tournament and the person we’re taking with us to go find out what happened to the Embodiments, along with Charleston Charge and Leo Leopolous. Be back tomorrow to read all about it!

Narrator: Some time later!
Jerald: I’ve never seen Mike P do anything like this since the old days.
Pikapunk: It was something, though. I remember one time I turned into a vampire and then he and Bob killed me.
Jerald: There was also that whole episode with the crystal demons. He was in rare form. Then he tried to steal Easter from that town and things just went downhill from there.
Metallic Spheroid: When he was in our world, he defeated one of our most powerful enemies.
Jerald: Really? Perhaps he just needed a bit of a break, then.
Mister Lucky: This trip down memory lane needs to end because we’ve got other things to worry about, fellas!
Jerald: The forces of good won the tournament.
Mister Lucky: Yeah, but you think the Red Scare and Purga and all those palookas will take that lying down?
Jerald: You’re right. Who do we have?
Mister Lucky: In addition to me, you, the squirrel and the sphere? The cube, the guy who just lost, the gamers, the priest, the bum, Land Captain, Charge’s girl, that Zorro knock-off, the vampire, the sap, the other bum, the wet blanket, the other cube, and the monster.
Jerald: …what?
Mister Lucky: Me, you, Pikapunk, Metallic Spheroid, Plasticine Cube, Captain Depresso, Players One and Two, Graves, Iavi, Land Captain, Edolie DePrit, the Forgiver, Ethan Crane, Purple Lamp, Baggy Johnson, Wyandotte Thompson, Shizamablock, and Flesh-Pod. Oh, and I guess Jimmy Swift is here, too.
Jerald: Why didn’t you just say that in the first place?
Mister Lucky: There’s no time for that! Look over there!
Jerald: It’s them!

Narrator: On the other side…
Red Scare: I won’t be able to take revenge on the green creature.
Purga the Demon-Thing: That’s all right, we’ll kill all his friends.
Red Scare: Ah. Fantastic. We should be able to kill quite a few of them, I think. All they have are shapes and bums, when we have the combined might of the Gemini Twin Troopers! Their power alone should allow us to prevail. Come forth!
Gemini Twin Troopers #1-3: Reporting!
Red Scare: Do it!
Gemini Twin Trooper #1: Do what?
Red Scare: The thing with the hands! You bump them together and more of you appear!
Gemini Twin Trooper #1: Well, you see, the funny thing about that is that-
Gemini Twin Trooper #2: We can’t do that.
Red Scare: …what? I saw you do it!
Gemini Twin Trooper #3: Yeah, that wasn’t us. Mandrake showed up and told us he’d help us win by making it look like we could do that because he hates those shapes. We can’t. There’s only three of us and Mandrake disappeared.
Red Scare: This is poor news, indeed. At least there’s three of you. Better than nothing. Who else do we have?
Purga: You should know by now.
Red Scare: I like hearing how powerful and evil my forces are. So please, humor me.
Purga: There’s you, me, and the Troopers. We also have Squibbons Johnson, the Animajor, and Agent Villain. Oh, and the two pyramids who managed to sneak in.
Red Scare: So we only have ten people.
Purga: Yes.
Red Scare: And they have how many?
Purga: Eighteen. We dwarf them in raw power, however. Jerald is the only truly powerful one on their side right now. Mister Lucky is just lucky, while most of the rest are simply slightly stronger human beings, save for Ethan Crane and Purple Lamp. Ethan is apathetic, however, and Purple Lamp is a fool.
Red Scare: They have super-heroes.
Purga: The super-heroes they have are Captain Depresso, Thomas Iavi, Land Captain, and the Forgiver. The only one who has any powers is Iavi, and they won’t work here.
Red Scare: What about Purple Lamp?
Purga: As I said, he’s too stupid to care about.
Red Scare: And the others?
Purga: They’re all minor obstacles. We have this, as they say, in the bag.
Red Scare: Well then, what are we waiting for? ATTACK!